They'd been on the run so long, Ed had long since lost track of the last time he'd slept in a bed instead of in an abandoned barn, or under a hedge.
Let it never be said that whatever his obsessive tendencies, Edward Elric was unable to enjoy life's simpler pleasures.
Heavy-lidded, he would savor them slowly, letting them seep into his mind's eye until he could see nothing else.
It was, and he hated to admit it, an intriguing proposal. Ed wondered who the General had leaned on to get it written in just such a way to make his alchemic blood tingle.
Ed was pretty sure that the Colonel had an office fetish.
The magazine told him he was doing it all wrong. First, it said he was boring. Then, it said he was bad in bed. Next, it said he was inconsiderate. After that, it told him he was gullible.
"Post break-up beer, all the way from Xing," Al grinned merrily. "Taken right off a cart heading for the royal court. See the lengths I go to to cheer you up?"
“I said no, Fullmetal--hey, what are you mmnph!”
There were lines that should never be crossed and things one should never wish for, and sometimes even the best of intentions were not enough.
"It's blue!" Edward announced with the voice of desperation.
Roy would have to remember to make Ed take a hot shower before sex; it would cut down on unpleasant cold shocks.
At a large mahogany desk, polished to an almost jewel-like shine, sat Colonel Edward Elric, who was deep into his paperwork. Or at least that is how he appeared.
Usually when he wanted something he just took the steps he knew were necessary to getting it.
"Let me get this straight — you want to kiss me to support a theory!?"
There was nothing more petulant on the face of the planet than Edward Elric when he felt he was owed something.
"Can I trust you," Ed's dewy eyes were huge and he looked somehow younger than he'd ever looked before.
Inevitably, within five minutes of the door shutting, he has me wanting to put my automail in his face.
"You're getting quite the list," Roy said. "Not that I am any sort of advocate for monogamy, but you certainly are taking full advantage of playing the field."
The Colonel should, by all that is logical in the world, be less intimidating out of his uniform.
"Hey! She did it blindfolded! No one else could do that! And better her than that old hag!"
His boyfriend. He wants me to be his boyfriend. He's wooing me with gifts. I'm being courted!
Life, the Fullmetal Alchemist decided viciously, wasn't fair.
It was well known around Central headquarters that Roy Mustang was lusting after the visiting Major-General.
"So, Colonel, when are you going to find my replacement?"
What he really wanted to know was something else - a question of 'why', quite likely.
It was an old argument — practically every night, the ritual sparring for who'd be in control.
Ed clapped his hands again and Roy felt distinctly cold in his nether regions.
Roy was far from at ease and he could not sleep, and so, instead, he watched Edward, feeling anxiety and guilt sink claws into his belly and tear into his mind.
When you live in a small apartment, it's hard to miss when your brother comes home smelling like sex and absinthe.
Roy had been among the rebels for weeks now, and he'd learned very early on that these men were dangerous, very dangerous.
"How do you manage to win, even when you lose?" he asked sleepily, some time later.
"Yeah, so I hear the best way to get anything out of you is by going through your pants," the boy said evenly.
Al crouches down on a dune looking down on the camp and draws an array in the sand, thinking of Gunnar with a dull pang of grief.
God, he's gorgeous, even cut up. Especially cut up.
This, too, was a pain that Edward had inflicted only on himself, but neither Roy nor Al had dared to say so.
The showy bastard snapped with a killer grin for their audience and really, Roy was meant for either politics or the stage.
His brother seemed to like it when the leather left marks, a residual token of ownership, even when the collar (by job-dictated necessity) had to be removed.
"No funny business!" Ed thundered, not fooled for one minute by that innocent look.
Ed growled under his breath, color high in his cheeks, and pulled away.
Yeah. Get it right and be honest, it's a little too good, a little too everything to let go of just yet.
It was sure to be a disaster.
Every rule in the book tells him that it's wrong, frat-er-nisation, number one cause of discharged officers in peace time situations.
A collection of 100 word ficlets.
"It's not that easy, Roy. You see, it's my fault he is this way. He honestly doesn't want to hurt me. He loves me..."
Roy had not wanted to cry for many years; he hadn't wept since Ishbal.
"Because," said Al flatly, "Roy is dark and handsome and--most importantly of all--charming. And you're short and blond and obnoxious."
As far as Edward was concerned it could just take for-damn-ever if it wanted because that’s how long he could go without taking to the Bastard.