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humor

Comedy, slapstick, and (sometimes) bad puns.


Ed shrugged, although his expression suggested he was trying to keep from being too smug about beating a man almost twice his age.

rated:G | GEN | Fullmetal | drama | humor


I noticed, Ed told him with as much edge as he could muster.

rated:K-S | S×S | Fullmetal | TWT | Ed/Roy | general | humor | pwp | sap


"My neighbors would start saying things behind my back if I took home a suit of armor."

rated:G | M+F | Mangaverse | crack | humor


You don't want to see spicy photos of my gorgeous girlfriend?

rated:K | GEN | Mangaverse | pre-series | SP: up to ch 62 | Maes Hughes | Roy Mustang | humor


She looked the wire over for a minute, noting where the insulation had been stripped away for retuning, then tugged it gently, careful not to pull too hard.

rated:G | M+F | Fullmetal | Ed/Winry | humor


Etiquette doesn't quite cover situations like this one.

rated:G | GENM+F | Fullmetal | Ed/Winry | humor


If armor could narrow its eyes, Ed knew Al would have been doing so.

rated:G | GEN | Fullmetal | humor


"Just talking and showing won't help much. He needs to try things before he can get them right."

rated:M-L-S | S×S | Fullmetal | DF: movie | bondage | humor | Al/Ed/Alfons


The first thing he was aware of when the aftershocks faded was an automail hand on his throat.

rated:M-L-S | S×S | Fullmetal | Ed/Roy | humor


"I like you a lot Al. I really do. It's just... you are kind of intimidating..." and seven feet tall, made of metal and a boy...

rated:G | S×S | Fullmetal | humor | Al/Havoc


The staff look at each other, look at their automail bottle-opener, and prepare to duck.

rated:G | GEN | Fullmetal | post-series | Edward Elric | Roy Mustang | humor | 354th FG HQ


“Brother, don’t be ungrateful! Ling is trying very hard to teach you proper use of the Xingian language!”

rated:G | GEN | Mangaverse | Lan Fan | Ling Yao | general | humor


Typical Ed; overprotective, hypocritical, condescending, and for some reason fundamentally incapable of treating Al as an equal.

rated:M-L-S | S×S | Fullmetal | humor | Al/Ed


"This," Edward said authoritatively, "is bullshit."

rated:G | GEN | Fullmetal | blanketfic | humor


Roy smiled slowly as Edward approached his desk, his usual careless pose turned into something... challenging.

rated:G | S+S | Fullmetal | Ed/Roy | humor


"I'm hungry."

rated:G | GEN | Fullmetal | Gluttony | Sloth | humor


"Well, I guess she can't keep him away from every bitch in heat around this place."

rated:K-L | GEN | Mangaverse | TWT | Alphonse Elric | Edward Elric | humor | 354th FG HQ


This really was turning out to be a day of surprises, thought Roy.

rated:K-L-V | S+S | Mangaverse | mid-series | SP: up to ch 35-ish | Alphonse Elric | Edward Elric | Riza Hawkeye | Roy Mustang | Ed/Roy | action | humor | UST


With two younger sisters himself, he knew well that siblings quarreled, but never to this extent.

rated:G | GEN | Fullmetal | crack | humor


Al decided he didn't like that particular grin on his brother's face.

rated:G | GEN | Fullmetal | unhappy Roy | humor


You could attribute it to teenage rebellion, if you liked, or to homunculus-hormones, which could be quite fierce, or heck, maybe she was just living up to her name.

rated:G | M+F | Fullmetal | mid-series | Lust/Roy | crack | humor


"I'm sorry! Look, I'll fix it. I didn't know it was going to turn out this way!"

rated:G | M+F | genderswitch | humor | parody


"Well... Brother does that, every so often. He really should think before he tries to attack people."

rated:G | GEN | Fullmetal | mid-series | Roy Mustang | humor | Elric Kyoudai


"Let me get this straight — you want to kiss me to support a theory!?"

rated:G | S+S | Fullmetal | mid-series | Ed/Roy | crack | humor


He was looking forward to the prospect of a hot meal in the cafeteria; even if it wasn't exactly home cooking, at least it was hot, and it was fresh.

rated:G | GEN | Fullmetal | mid-series | humor | Elric Kyoudai


And then the Words were coming again, maddening addiction crawling straight down inside, making him itch, making him want.

rated:M-L-S | S×S | Fullmetal | mid-series | humor | Ed/self


"You'd think the Colonel would have plenty of experience in dealing with irate brothers by now."

rated:G | S×S | Fullmetal | TWT | Alphonse Elric | Ed/Roy | humor | 354th FG HQ


Unexpectedly, the door flew open with a loud bang, steps sounded on the tile, and a very familiar, very cranky voice said...

rated:K-L-S | S×S | Fullmetal | blood | humor | pwp | Ed/Envy/Roy


Sometimes he outright disappeared for hours, leaving Al feeling panicked.

rated:G | S+S | humor | Ed/__


Welcome to the military, Fullmetal."

rated:G | S×S | Fullmetal | humor | kink | Ed/Various


Okay, his hair wasn't brushed, and it had been a while since he'd gotten a bath, but he didn't think it was anything to blush at.

rated:G | GEN | Fullmetal | pre-series | Edward Elric | Winry Rockbell | humor


"What do you mean, you're PREGNANT?" Ed yelled through the door.

rated:G | GEN | Fullmetal | SP: ep 28 | Izumi Curtis | humor | parody | Elric Kyoudai | mpreg


Ed looked down at the camera again, and smiled an evil, evil smile.

rated:G | GEN | Fullmetal | humor | Elric Kyoudai | 354th FG HQ


"I know those court ordered anger management classes were years ago, but you've come such a long way."

rated:M-L-S | S×S | Fullmetal | post-series | Al/Riza | Ed/Roy | drama | fluff | humor | romance | Havoc/OC | next-gen


He was just contemplating a launch, kick and a dash for the window when Armstrong's hands closed in his hair.

rated:G | GEN | Fullmetal | humor | cosplay


He could imagine the words Fix typed as coming from his brother, and it afforded him a little bit of indulgence in his horrible, sinful, uncontrollable urges.

rated:M-L-S | S×S | Alt Universe | autoeroticism | humor | Al/Ed | meta


The Colonel narrowly saved himself the disgrace of fumbling for Edward's name (Id? Alex? Eowan?) by resorting, once again, to his title.

rated:G | GEN | Fullmetal | humor


The Colonel's staff next door ignored the pleas for help and gunshots.

rated:G | S×S | Fullmetal | mid-series | fluff | humor


Ed saw Roy's fingers twitch and curl at his sides as the desire to embrace almost overwhelmed discretion and good sense.

rated:G | S×S | Fullmetal | Ed/Roy | fluff | humor


"...Sir..." he tried, beginning to compose himself again. "Don't you think...ah...that this isn't very professional of either of us?"

rated:M-L-S | M×F | Fullmetal | mid-series | Best Humorous Smut, TKKN Contest | Offsite Award | Armstrong/Envy | crack | humor


"You know we need to catch that train to Central, and you were being unreasonable. If we're late getting back again, General Mustang's going to have a fit."

rated:K | S×S | Fullmetal | post-series | crack | general | humor | Al/Ed


That was the problem with girls these days... they just didn't know how to deal with a little pain.

rated:G | GEN | Fullmetal | mid-series | Edward Elric | OC | Pinako Rockbell | humor


... and the moral of the story is - well, I guess there's no moral to this story, it's just a bunch of stuff that happened. Kind of like the rest of this movie.

rated:G | GEN | Shambhala | all-series | SP: movie | crack | humor | script | parody


"So ...." Havoc tried to look nonchalant. "Fullmetal's hair is, uh ... bright."

rated:M-L | GEN, S+S S×S | Fullmetal | angst | humor | pwp


"So," said Ling. "I was thinking, perhaps my father can buy out Ed's contract."

rated:M-L-S | S×S | Mangaverse | Ling/Roy | humor | pwp


"Go back to sleep, Mustang," Ed answers absently, flipping the page.

rated:G | S×S | Fullmetal | Ed/Roy | humor


"I am not obsessed with Edward Elric!"

rated:M-L-S | S×S | Fullmetal | mid-series | SP: ep 10-11 | Ed/Russell | dubcon | humor | redux | romance


"So. You came," Scar greeted the person inside.

rated:M-L | S×S | Fullmetal | Ed/Scar | humor


Edward Elric swallows.

rated:G | S×S | Fullmetal | TWT | Ed/Roy | humor


Really, who said that a woman's sex life had to end at 60? An experienced woman had a lot to offer, and Pinako was quite, quite experienced.

rated:M-L-S | M×F | Fullmetal | crack | humor | ref. drugs | Pinako/Roy | Ed/Czeska/Winry