Comedy, slapstick, and (sometimes) bad puns.
Ed frowned slightly; that thought pushed dangerously at the border of sappiness.
"So," said Ling. "I was thinking, perhaps my father can buy out Ed's contract."
Fullmetal was starting to turn slightly purple, now, which definitely clashed with his coloring...
You had to hand it to Roy, he certainly knew how to keep his cool.
He mostly trusted his brother to be able to put a nearly-three-year-old to bed by himself, but...Al should probably check, just to be sure.
"So ...." Havoc tried to look nonchalant. "Fullmetal's hair is, uh ... bright."
"We ought to have a toast," Ed says, frowning into the depths of his bottle. "They always do when they're having a drink in someone's memory."
The Colonel narrowly saved himself the disgrace of fumbling for Edward's name (Id? Alex? Eowan?) by resorting, once again, to his title.
The only other tradition that was better than eggnog to Al, was that of mistletoe.
Around two o'clock in the afternoon, women around the city began to disappear ... and a crowd, primarily of females, formed along Third Street.
The staff look at each other, look at their automail bottle-opener, and prepare to duck.
“Your latest expense reports left something to be desired. Why don’t you have a seat, and we’ll go over them.” “I’ll stand, thanks.”
"Hey, Ed, you're awfully cheery this morning."
"Colonel, if I may ask... what is a cat, to be more precise, a kitten doing in the office?"
"You. Boy by the window who's been doodling all the way through. What would be the result of this equation?"
This would be so much easier if he could just refuse the man to his face.
"I must savor every moment of every love letter I recieve to do the sender justice," Mustang said, before proceeding to open the letter.
The kid had said she was into ... different things, but in all his years Greed could not recall ever having found eggs a helpful sex aide.
Ed jabbed accusingly with an automail finger — nearly putting out Mustang's eye as he did so — and shrieked, "You're a crossdresser!"
There was a crunching noise from Roy's direction, as of teeth biting through the edge of a porcelain cup.
Let it never be said that whatever his obsessive tendencies, Edward Elric was unable to enjoy life's simpler pleasures.
Ed tilted his head down, looked up under Greed's bangs — and there, he saw a familiar, shaky grin.
"I know those court ordered anger management classes were years ago, but you've come such a long way."
That was the problem with girls these days... they just didn't know how to deal with a little pain.
"Brother says Mr. Mustang grabbed his behind today while he was at the blackboard," he explained as his blush slowly faded, and Ed scowled.
"...That is an order, Fullmetal, and I will have you court-martialed if you refuse."
It doesn’t disappoint, never does; Ed is standing on the corner when the car arrives, all sharp moody edges and obtrusively coloured blue shorts.
Al decided he didn't like that particular grin on his brother's face.
"It's good to hear that Fullmetal is in good spirits, if he's being so obtrusive in showing off."
"I remember the flavor too; it was strawberry. It's still his favorite."
The first thing he was aware of when the aftershocks faded was an automail hand on his throat.
ROY: [calmly] If drinking means acting like an idiot the way you are, I'm going to pass.
He lay back on the couch (in Roy Mustang's office, where else?) and declared , "I'm not wearing this."
Really, who said that a woman's sex life had to end at 60? An experienced woman had a lot to offer, and Pinako was quite, quite experienced.
The Full Metal Alchemist, of course, accepted his assignment with all the gravity due his station.
"For only one arm..." Ed rasped out, gritting his teeth against the pain.
It started with Ling's lips simply pressed up against Ed's. Well, of course it did. That was how kisses sort of went, but this was, well, a bit surprising.
It was honestly not a kiss.
"I am not obsessed with Edward Elric!"
Alchemy. It's all fun and games until somebody loses a limb and creates an abomination.
He gently turned Ed's head so that he faced the camera, and with just a little luck, Ling would catch that amazing expression Ed always had when he came.
After three years, two months, fourteen days and five hours of anticipation, Roy heard a knock at the door to his house.
"Yeah. Him again. The Colonel doesn't know when to quit, does he?"
Now Ed was into his favorite mode, bitch-at-the-bastard-father-who-ditched-us.
"Oh yeah... Huh!" Ed looked around, brightening. "Wow, it looks a lot different upright and not burning."