Comedy, slapstick, and (sometimes) bad puns.
"Our boy here hasn't done a lick of work since eleven am, and she hasn't noticed at all. D'you think she's in love?"
It was, and he hated to admit it, an intriguing proposal. Ed wondered who the General had leaned on to get it written in just such a way to make his alchemic blood tingle.
"My neighbors would start saying things behind my back if I took home a suit of armor."
Fullmetal smiled a long, slow smile, the sort that promised evil things were in the near future, and put his boots up on Roy's desk.
Fullmetal was starting to turn slightly purple, now, which definitely clashed with his coloring...
The voice hit Ed like a blow, and drove the breath from his lungs. "Where are you?" he shouted. "Where are you?"
With a sense of rising dread, Alphonse raised his fist to pound for admittance, worry tinging his voice. "Brother? Are you alright in there?"
This really was turning out to be a day of surprises, thought Roy.
"You have no idea how good you look right now," Roy said.
He was also certain that if he gave in and laughed, Edward would hang up and never speak to him again.
Ed looked down at the camera again, and smiled an evil, evil smile.
The only problem was that Ed didn't know what the heck "getting some" was or what he was being congratulated for.
"Alchemy is intended for the public good. If it wasn't anything illegal, why the need for secrecy?"
"Half the time you get surprised it's with some shit you didn't even want, the other half of the time you get surprised, you barely avoid getting killed."
"I know, I know, the deal is whoever's on bottom gets to pick your shape, but really, this is ridiculous."
"Oh, what would YOU know? said Winry. "You've never looked at a girl in your life."
You could attribute it to teenage rebellion, if you liked, or to homunculus-hormones, which could be quite fierce, or heck, maybe she was just living up to her name.
Schezcka pushed her glasses up, using the glass reflection to hide her eyes.
As stated in the catalog, our Model 436b Hairless Ape is highly customizable, designed with the discerning deity in mind.
Ed loved his brother, and would take his company as a roommate over anyone in the world — except one; but he made a damn lousy substitute for a girlfriend.
"I'll have you know I'm in a committed monogamous relationship."
"You and I? Sleeping together?" Hughes snorted disdain, and spared a hand to push his glasses back up his face. "Ridiculous!"
Let it never be said that whatever his obsessive tendencies, Edward Elric was unable to enjoy life's simpler pleasures.
The door opened, and all the energy Ed had been ready to put towards transmuting the door into a pile of sticks drained out of him through his feet.
“Sir,” he says, and Roy could be imagining it, but he thinks Falman’s usually flat tone has a hint of panic in it. “Have you read this memo yet?”
The air feels cold against Al's face, and even colder down his naked back.
That was the problem with girls these days... they just didn't know how to deal with a little pain.
He was just contemplating a launch, kick and a dash for the window when Armstrong's hands closed in his hair.
Louis Alex Armstrong has been seriously wounded... BUT THE SOUL STILL BURNS.
"You could have roped in the typing pool instead, they moon over the Colonel all the time."
At a large mahogany desk, polished to an almost jewel-like shine, sat Colonel Edward Elric, who was deep into his paperwork. Or at least that is how he appeared.
Apparently, years of stress had jaded Ed into thinking that if things were looking good now, then something terrible must be around the corner.
"What do you mean, you're PREGNANT?" Ed yelled through the door.
He lay back on the couch (in Roy Mustang's office, where else?) and declared , "I'm not wearing this."
"Colonel, if I may ask... what is a cat, to be more precise, a kitten doing in the office?"
A small biological flaw, if one could even consider it that.
One day Edward was out kicking the crap out of those damn Homunculus with Al...
A collection of 100 word ficlets.
"I remember the flavor too; it was strawberry. It's still his favorite."
"I must savor every moment of every love letter I recieve to do the sender justice," Mustang said, before proceeding to open the letter.
With two younger sisters himself, he knew well that siblings quarreled, but never to this extent.
Typical Ed; overprotective, hypocritical, condescending, and for some reason fundamentally incapable of treating Al as an equal.
Smug, he'd stayed just long enough to give his report and then had marched straight off to Resembool with Al lagging behind.
"...Sir..." he tried, beginning to compose himself again. "Don't you think...ah...that this isn't very professional of either of us?"
"Edward," Hawkeye said kindly, "has it occurred to you that you and Alphonse may be spending too much time alone?"
“Um, you must’ve learned that from Colonel Bastard. You’d better not be flashing that at the nurses. Or at me, ever, ever again.”
"You know we need to catch that train to Central, and you were being unreasonable. If we're late getting back again, General Mustang's going to have a fit."