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OTP


"Guh...Got it!" Ed thumps back down on his heels, beaming victoriously. The ball, dislodged from the roof gutter, falls to the grass with a muffled thump. "Mission accomplished, Lady Alicia!"

"Thank you Edward-niisan!" Alicia chirps happily. "It's good you're so big!"

In a blur of red and flying braid, Ed is on his knees before her. "Alicia?"

"Yes?"

"Say that again?"

"You're so big, Edward-niisan," obliged Alicia, who barely made it past Ed's beltline at age four.

"I LOVE YOU ALICIA!" He drops the ball to seize Alicia's hands, looking at her with the eyes of true love.

"I LOVE YOU TOO, EDWARD-NIISAN!" replies Alicia enthusiastically.

There's an ominous click, and Ed's eyes nearly cross as he looks into a gun barrel.

"Gurk." says Edward.

"Edward Elric," intones Hughes, light reflecting off his glasses, "Think carefully before you speak."

"Erk."

"Tell me," Hughes breathes dangerously, "Are your intentions towards my daughter honourable?"

AND THEY LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER. THE END.