"God, I was so in love with you back then," Ed said, looking out the window at the heavy sky, tracing the reflections of raindrops on the arms wrapped around him. "You don't know how nuts it made me. I think I hated you for it. I couldn't even hear your fucking voice without getting a hard-on I barely knew what to do with."
"Why didn't you say anything?" Roy asked, freeing an arm to stroke Ed's hair back behind his ear.
Ed laughed, short and bitter. "I was fifteen years old. You were twenty-nine and fucked anything in a skirt. I don't know what I would've done if you'd patted me on the head and sent me home, except that it would probably have involved me killing you slowly."
"Did you want to tell me?"
"Yes," Ed whispered. "Fuck, yes. I'd have died for you, Mustang. I wanted you to look at me and know it, just once, even if you never touched me."
Roy sighed and pulled him closer. "Maybe you should have trusted me to guard your heart better than I guarded the rest of you, Fullmetal."
Too much. This wasn't making things better, today. Ed pulled away and sat up, raking a hand through his hair. "I should go. Al's gonna start asking questions soon. When you live in a small apartment it's hard to miss when your brother comes home smelling like sex and absinthe."
Roy lifted himself up on one elbow, blinking sleepily in the dim light, sheets falling in disarray around his chest. "You'll think of something to tell him."
Ed closed his eyes. "Yeah. Yeah, I will. I'll see you next week?"
"Whenever you want," Roy said, and sounded like he meant it.
Ed pulled his clothes on, left the money on the table, and went back out into the cold Munich rain.