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The Adventures of Roy Mustang: Sex Ed Teacher

chapter 1.

He stood dumbfounded outside the door of his office, looking down the hall at the two figures there. They had their backs to him. It was late, much to late for anyone to be about. How had they slipped past the guards? He was here because he'd snuck out early for a date, and come back to finish up some paperwork so Hawkeye wouldn't riddle him with bullets or barbs in the morning.

But that did not explain why the Elric brothers were here.

Did they honestly think that all that clanking Alphonse's armour made was stealthy?

He waited until they moved; they never once looked back in his direction. He used the clunking of Al's armor to mask his own footsteps and then peered around the corner.

Ed was eyeing a door and then he turned to look up and down the hall. Roy Mustang ducked quickly back around the corner. He was too intrigued by their childish attempt at espionage to stop them just yet, what were they after? A bright light flashed in the hallway, signaling Ed's alchemy. This is how he picked locks. Well, that explained why Roy had to bail them out of jail several times from afar.

That is, he had to bail Ed out of jail. For some reason Al never seemed to get caught.

Little did the Flame Alchemist know that in those panicked situations Al froze up and acted just what he looked like, a suit of empty armor. Leaving the nefarious short, blond bandit that was trying to make off with him to deal with the authorities alone. It had happened so many times that there were rumors around the smaller towns about the bandit and his odd armor fetish.

He waited a few heartbeats then rounded the corner himself and moved quietly to the doorway. Ah, the records room. The one Scheizka was charged with, the off-limits records room. He knew it would only take a moment or two for the both of them to be thoroughly engrossed, so he bided his time, picked at a bit of lint on the finger of his glove. When he knew he would scare the living hell out of them by walking in, he did so.

"What brings you boys out so late?" he asked in his smooth flat tone, not raising his voice above conversation level.

Al JUMPED. It was amusing to see the large form leap suddenly, maybe a good foot off the ground, impressive Roy thought, and land on his equally startled elder brother, who barely had time to manage a squeak before getting pounded into the carpet. Roy stood patiently, still eyeing the ever-present lint on his gloves until they sorted themselves out and started stammering excuses, or rather in Ed's case, counter-threats.

"What are you doing here?" Ed demanded, once he'd re-inflated the lungs that Al had tried to crush. "Isn't it late for you to be skulking about, Colonel?" Al was more contrite, as usual.

"We're really sorry sir!" He said in the rushed embarrassed way he always did when Ed was being—well, Ed.

"I have the authority to be here Fullmetal, where as you don't, especially not in here." Roy glanced around the room, then walked over slowly to where the boys had managed to pull down an impressive number of books in the short time they'd been here. Ed and Al both began to quickly gather the books up, shoving them back on the shelves as the Colonel approached.

"What are you looking for?" Roy asked.

"The usual stuff, what do you think? I know you're holding out on me, you always know things before me, how do you do that? I'm the one out there busting my ass!" Ed gave him a sneer and crammed another book onto the shelf. "Since we're not allowed in here I figure this is as good a place as any to start looking for your sources."

Ed was bright, always very bright.

"You know I could have you both arrested," Roy said, his tone flat, he put his hands in his pockets, "and this time you'd go along with him Alphonse."

Ed leapt to his feet. "No! Leave Al out of it, he's not in the military anyways!" he snarled and took a half step toward Roy, moving in front of Al, always ready to defend Al.

"But he's breaking and entering on military property," Roy informed Ed coldly, "And that is a serious offense." Of course he would do no such thing, but he could have sworn the armour looked paler.

"No, you can arrest me, do whatever to me, just leave Al out of it!" Ed insisted, his voice cracking a bit as it always did when he was stressed. He was never good at hiding his emotions.

Ed wanted the blame. Always Ed shouldered the blame.

Roy fixed them with his dark eyes. Ed squared his shoulders, maybe he was trying to look taller, shield Al from the Colonel's glare.

"Alphonse," Roy snapped, "you return to your dorm room. As for you," he let his black eyes met gold ones, "you come with me." And the Colonel spun on his heel and strode out of the room. "And I expect you'll be repairing that lock." He said over his shoulder.

Ed snarled at his retreating back, only to be caught off guard by a large hand settling on his shoulder.

"Sorry brother," Al said, "but you better do as he says."

Ed sighed and nodded. "Yeah, I'm sorry I got you busted Al, don't wait up for me, 'kay?" He always said it, even though he knew Al couldn't sleep. And Al always said, "Ok."

Roy listened as a lone pair of footsteps traveled up the hall to the door of his office. It was left slightly ajar. He could tell Fullmetal coming from a mile off, the slight unevenness of his stride, due to his automail no doubt.

Ed pushed into the office, but stood in the doorway for a moment.

"Come in and close the door." Roy said, sitting with his elbows on his desk, fingers laced.

Ed sighed, shut the door and approached the desk. He stopped a few feet shy of it and folded his arms. "Ok, so you caught us," he said, but his voice didn't hold much sarcasm, Ed never shirked when he did something wrong.

"Well I can't say I'm totally shocked, the way you go after information would remind one of a starving wolf going after meat," Roy shook his head, "but I can't condone it either. You take far too many liberties with the long leash I allow you."

Ed's jaw tightened predictably. He clenched and unclenched his fist. But he would take a certain amount of abuse, Roy knew him too well. He knew Ed considered it equal trade for the wrong he had done.

"No retort," Roy said mildly, "how unlike you. Does that mean you think I'm right?" And how uncharitable of me, Roy thought, to take advantage of a contrite Fullmetal.

Ed visibly struggled and worked his mouth before finally speaking. He was doing a remarkable job of restraining himself Roy noted. He was growing up a bit it seemed.

"I'm sorry Colonel," Ed grated between clenched teeth, "please believe me when I say I won't do it again." And then Ed panted, like it had been a struggle to give that little apology speech, and Roy knew that it truly had been.

"We." The Colonel corrected him.

Ed cocked an eyebrow.

"You and your brother, say it, WE will never do it again." Roy leaned back in his chair.

"Fine," Ed snapped, "we." Well that blew that plan. Promise for himself but not for Al. Too bad the bastard Colonel saw through it.

Ed had apologized and done a fine job of it. He'd even given in to the fact that Roy knew good and well a promise for himself was not a promise for Al, but then let Roy extract it anyways.

"Are you alright?" The Colonel suddenly asked.

"Huh? Me? I'm fine." Ed said, a bit taken aback.

"Well, Al did land on you pretty hard," and Roy let the familiar smirk cross his lips and Ed relaxed and just like that they were back to their usual dance.

"That's because you startled him, you didn't have to sneak up on us like that you know!" Ed leaned forward a little in emphasis. The boy always expressed with his body. Roy found he rather enjoyed it.

"Yes I did, you should have seen the look on your face," and the smirk slid into a cocky grin as Ed turned red and took a deep breath.

"WHO DID YOU SAY WAS SO MINISCULE HIS OWN BROTHER DIDN'T SEE HIM AND SAT ON HIM?!" Ed howled.

"Ah, " Roy said, "that would be you."

Ed practically leapt to the desk and slammed his hands down on it. "You're a regular bastard Colonel Mustang" he snarled, "and when I'm not your dog anymore you better believe I'm gonna bite!"

Roy leaned forward suddenly, and they were nose to nose.

"Do you bite hard Fullmetal?" Roy grinned, he just meant to tease the boy, throw him more off guard, and be entertained by another amusing display of flailing and screeching. But he wasn't prepared for the widening of golden eyes, the flush that wasn't anger that started on his nose and spread to his cheeks and then the rushed back pedal that landed the boy on his ass on the floor in front of his desk.

What the hell?

Roy stood. "Ed, you ok?"

Ed looked up at him for a moment, when Roy started to come around the desk, Ed scrambled to his feet.

"I'm fine!" the boy said, waving his hands back and forth.

Roy took a step forward, Ed took a step back. Roy stopped, Ed stopped. Roy tilted his head, mocked taking a step forward and Ed jumped a step back. This was interesting. What exactly was going on here? Roy liked puzzles but not mysteries. And his forte was blunt, was it not?

"Fullmetal, tell me what's wrong," he said, looking down on the boy who was watching him with a wary look. A look a rabbit might give a fox that approached too close for it's liking.

Ed quickly shuttered his expression and narrowed his eyes. Shutting me out, Roy thought.

"Nothing, nothing is wrong, I better go," Ed took another step back then turned toward the door.

"You can't," Roy said simply. Ed whipped around on him.

"You can't keep me here you bastard!" Ed said, voice starting to rise, but then he remembered, yes...yes he could. Ed was a criminal, he had broke and entered.

The Colonel folded his arms. "Ok then, explain yourself to the guard."

Ed hung his head. "Right," and he let out a sigh, "you gonna walk me out?"

Roy headed back around the desk and reclaimed his seat. "When I'm ready, I came here for a reason too you know, and now I have to finish what you and your brother interrupted. Really Fullmetal, sometimes you have the worst luck."

Ed grimaced and threw himself onto one of the couches. "I'm fate's bitch, or haven't you figured that out yet?" Ed sneered.

Roy almost laughed, but instead he bowed his head over his paperwork.

When next he looked up, the boy was lying on the couch, on his side, mostly curled up. Roy wondered how he could be comfortable with his head pillowed on his automail arm. Then he realized Ed was asleep. He finished up the last of the documents and straightened his desk a bit. Stood and got his coat and walked over to the couch, meaning to reach down and shake Ed awake. But instead he stopped and watched him for a moment.

Ed was an enigma. Such an attitude and such a mouth on a child that looked like this. Heavy golden bangs lay on his cheek. His flesh hand beneath his chin, fingers curled. He had a slightly turned up nose, adding to his youthful looks, and it was rather cute and his pursed lips almost didn't seem quite right on a boy. When his eyes were closed his lashes brushed his cheeks and when they were open they were deep amber gold, framed in the self same dark lashes. Again, not quite right on a boy. Ed must favor his mother Roy finally concluded, and Al the father. Since he'd never met either he made the assumptions he could.

Ed made a soft noise in his sleep, his brow furrowed. Dreaming, Roy thought, still standing there, looking down. Wonder what he dreams of? I'm sure he's seen enough in his short time. You think you know him, and Al, but you really don't know them as well as you think you do Roy Mustang, the Colonel mused to himself. What must it have been like, giving up your arm? Your leg? Your body? I don't even think the brothers Elric could describe it fully....just as well, maybe in time it will fade. With that the Colonel leaned over and placed a hand on Ed's shoulder, to give him a gentle shake.

"Fullmetal..." he began.

Ed came up screaming, he flailed out with arms and legs and toppled himself off the couch. Roy jumped back and watched Ed thrash on the floor for a moment or two before barking, "FULLMETAL!" to get his attention. That seemed to do the trick.

There are eyes no man should have, let alone a boy. Ed was lying on his back, on the floor, panting. He was looking up at Roy with such a look that the Colonel almost didn't have the breath to speak.

But he did. "You were obviously having a nightmare," he said first and firmly, to reassure Ed, anything to make that look go away. That worst look, that look that was eating at him. Roy almost wanted to throw his coat over the boy's head, just to make the look go away.

Ed's lips moved but no words came forth. A first, Roy mused grimly. The boy's chest was heaving, as if he'd been running and then his tongue skated out to wet his lips. Small and pink, running over the lips that Roy had wondered about earlier. Roy slowly reached down and offered his hand. Ed stared at it for a long moment before he raised his own hand, his gloved hand, his automail hand, and put it in the Colonel's. Another moment held suspended while they both looked at their clasped hands, then Roy pulled and Ed stood.

The metal hand in his own shook. Roy didn't release it right away. Ed looked around in apparent bewilderment, as if trying to figure out where he was and how he'd gotten there.

"Are you alright?" The Colonel asked.

Gold eyes flashed to his dark ones, the look was still there, but it was muted, he nodded slowly, tugged on his hand. Roy released him.

"Bad dream?" Roy asked again.

Ed nodded. Roy wasn't used to not being offered words. Edward Elric was all about words. From the first moment he'd set foot in this office, and Roy suspected to his dying breath, words would be an integral part of Ed's life. To be denied Ed's words was a bit unsettling. Ed noticed the scrutiny, he scowled but it was uneven and half-hearted. He tugged on the sleeves of is familiar long red coat, at the ends of his gloves.

Was he shaking?

Roy shrugged on his own coat. Trying not to be obvious about watching Edward. The boy was shaking. He reached out again slowly, put his hand on the boy's left shoulder, so Ed could feel the warmth in the contact.

Ed jumped, looked at Roy with wide eyes but he did not pull away.

"Let's go get some coffee" Roy suggested, "that is if you're up to it? I'll take you back to your dorm room if......"

"N-no" Ed interrupted, "coffee is good...fine...please..." Ed trailed off in a mix of tangled words and shaking shoulders.

Roy nodded, removed his hand then gestured for Ed to proceed him to the door.

Ed quirked an eyebrow. "It's...it's not a date..." he tried to joke.

He has trouble showing weakness.

We are similar creatures.

"Well I would hope not," Roy said, and when Ed didn't move right away, Roy touched him again, behind his left shoulder and gave him a gentle push. "If we were you'd be dressed better," Roy teased gently.

"There's nothing wrong with the way I dress," Ed said, fighting to keep his voice steady , the look, Roy noted with relief, was already fading. He obligingly let the Colonel usher him, move him down the hall where the Colonel bowed his head to a puzzled guard, took him down the steps and along the walk to the car lot.

Roy started to open the passenger side door for him, but Ed grunted and batted his hand away, gave him a proper scowl.

"I'm not helpless and it's not a date," he grunted.

"Right," the Colonel said with his customary smirk.

"Just drive already," Ed said as he got in and pulled the door closed.

Driving was comfortable. A silent Fullmetal Alchemist was not. Ed had his head leaned against the glass of the passenger side window. It was very late and there was no traffic. He hadn't uttered a word since they'd left headquarters.

Roy wasn't sure how to break the silence. Ed was hostile at the best of times and volatile at the worst. He pulled up to a stop sign and sat. After a moment, Ed looked over at him.

"After you stop you can go," he said, "I've never driven one of these but I've seen the pictures."

"I'm well aware of the laws of traffic Fullmetal, " Roy settled a smirk on his features to make the boy more comfortable, Ed liked to spar. "What I'm not familiar with is your silence, want to talk about it?"

Ed's jaw set, he stared at the dashboard.

"How about you just start with one word?" Roy prompted.

"No." Ed grated between his teeth.

"That's one word." Roy let the car move forward again.

"Who asked you?!" The teenage alchemist suddenly exploded, "It sure wasn't me, I didn't ask you to be there, or to catch us and I sure as hell didn't ask you to be all....." Ed flailed his hands, "...like this! Understanding and shit! I didn't ask for coffee, I didn't ask for any of it!"

"But how like me to offer it anyways," Roy responded smoothly, voice silky and level, "That's the most you've said in the last hour."

"Shut up! Just shut the hell up! I don't need your sympathy or your help or whatever else it is you've got going for you! " Ed turned his head and leveled a molten golden glare at the Colonel. "I'm just fine! I'm taking care of it, ME! I'll take care of Al too!" he stopped abruptly, as if suddenly all the motivation left him, swung his face away too look back out the passenger side window.

"Quite a nefarious little display," Roy said, "I can appreciate you wanting to take care of the situation and your little brother. Both noteworthy causes I'm sure." Roy pulled the car over to the curb and set it into park.

"Where are we?" Ed asked, looking over at him again.

"My place, where you can rant to your hearts content and not make a public spectacle of yourself." The Colonel said.

Ed made a derisive snort and opened the passenger side door and slide out of the car, Roy did the same on his side. Roy walked around the car and up the walk, twisting the keys in his hands, jogging up the three short steps to his front stoop. He stopped, looked back at the car. Ed still stood beside it, one hand on the car door as if by touching the door it was holding him in place.

Roy turned and unlocked the door, opened it, then looked back at Ed again. He didn't say anything. If the boy piped up he'd like to go back to the dorms now, well that would be alright. Roy would take him. But instead he saw Ed visibly swallow, slowly remove his hand from the car door and start up the walk. The familiar red long coat swirled around his knees and he shoved his hands into the pockets of his black leather pants. He never once raised his gaze to Roy's.

Roy stood back and let Ed enter first. The young alchemist stopped just inside the doorway, looked around. Ever wary of any unfamiliar territory. It was a good thing. Roy waited patiently. Ed turned and looked at him again, a faint blushing crossed his cheeks, and then he walked into the living room proper, which was just off the entrance foyer.

Roy took off his coat and hung it on the mirrored rack over the bench to one side of his foyer and followed suit.

"Want to hang your coat on the rack?" he asked, the young alchemist started, the slowly pulled off his coat. Roy came forward and took it from him, silencing his immediate protest. "You're my guest Edward, it's alright if I hang up your coat." Roy did just that, noting the striking difference then. Ed's bright red worse for wear duster hanging next to his serene immaculate black trench. The corner of his mouth quirked into a bit of a smile.

The boy looked decidedly uncomfortable. Not unlike the proverbial bull in a china shop, Roy decided. Roy's furnishings were eclectic comfort. His heavy couch, wooden coffee table and large ottoman belayed his grandfather's antique book cases, his grandmother's library table and his mother's phone stand which was currently being used as a lamp table next to a big comfortable leather bound chair.

Ed must have felt he needed to say something. "It..it's a nice place." He managed, hugging his elbows.

"It's not much" Roy said, "But it's home. You can sit down Fullmetal, I'll go start some coffee." He waved toward the bookcases. "Or if you'd rather you can always browse through those. Though not as impressive as Major Armstrong's lineage, my grandfather had a book or two that was very enlightening." He turned abruptly and left the boy there, hoping that by giving Ed some time alone he might relax a bit in the strange surroundings. It really wasn't like Ed to be so timid, and Roy was certain he didn't like it.

He shrugged out of his uniform jacket and dropped it over the back of a small kitchen chair and unbuttoned his cuffs to roll up his sleeves. He should be grateful Fullmetal was showing some restraint for once. He sometimes wondered at the marked contrast between the Elric brothers. The younger; soft spoken, polite, reserved. The elder; brash and loud and boisterous. Quick witted and sharp tempered. Easy to anger, slow to trust. All these things were Edward Elric.

Roy hoped he had sugar. He knew Ed's aversion to milk, but had seen the boy use coffee as a vehicle to drink obscene amounts of sugar. Even Havoc, the coffee-syrup maker, had commented on Ed's intake.

"Must be why the boss is always so hyper," Havoc had conjectured around his ever-present cigarette.

He heard Ed before he saw him. Try as he might the boy would never be able to completely hide the footfall of his automail from the Colonel's sharp ears. Ed peered first around the doorway of the kitchen, then eyes lighting on Roy he stepped into it.

Neither said anything right away. Roy opened a cabinet and brought down two porcelain mugs. Plain, heavy white mugs. He was a bachelor and had no need for life's finer things. Ed looked around the plain white kitchen. He actually turned in a circle, then looked back to Roy who was opening a counter top canister.

"What?" Roy asked.

"It's so neat," Ed said, "and clean. I don't know, you don't strike me as the type to do housework I guess." The boy shrugged.

"Good call, I don't." Roy said, spooning coffee into the bottom of a beat up silver stove top percolator, "Mrs. Cates comes and cleans once a week. I really only use it as a place to occasionally sleep, so I don't have the opportunity to mess it up."

"Unlike your office," Ed added, which earned him a slight and wry grin from the older man.

"Well that's what Lt. Hawkeye is for," Roy said and capping the canister and putting it back in its place.

It earned a bit of a smile out of the blond alchemist. "Bet she'd drill you right between the eyes if she heard you say that" Ed said, almost in a companionable tone.

It dropped to silence again. The boy shifted and the Colonel watched the coffee pot.

"Why did you bring me here?" Ed finally asked, voice uncertain and awkward in the kitchen silence.

"You seemed like you needed to talk, and you're not very adept at controlling yourself when you're in a passion. So, I thought it might be better if you had a limited arena in which to share your views," Roy said quietly, not looking at Ed.

Roy heard more shifting, Ed moving around the kitchen area behind him.

"...nightmares," Ed finally said quietly, "I just have nightmares, everyone does."

"I can imagine your nightmares are a little more vivid than most," Roy said, watching the pot start to perk, "You've seen a lot in a mere 15 years."

"I'm not a kid," came the heated boyish tenor behind him, "if that is what you're trying to say."

"Nothing of the sort," Roy replied, "even though you are still a child. You don't like to acknowledge it, but that doesn't make it any less true."

"I'm not a CHILD!" Ed's voice roared behind him rising in pitch and volume It almost, almost made Roy jump.

"The things I've..... we've done... I'm NOT and neither is AL, we have as much right to be treated as adults as any I've ever met, and MORE than some!" Ed howled, "And I don't need your pompous ass to tell me otherwise!"

Roy move the percolator off the heat. He slowly turned to face Ed, leaned back on the counter and folded his arms.

"So you've managed to achieve adulthood, I see, quite an accomplishment. But then you are the great Fullmetal Alchemist, lest I forget. A man of many achievements. " Roy said evenly. "And while I won't begrudge you the truth that you and Al are worthy of more respect of most adults that I know, I will counter that more often than not, you find yourself out of your league, and by luck or chance you always prevail. That is the prerogative of the young, you know. Don't be so quick to give up your rite of passage from childhood."

Ed's lips curled upward in a nasty smirk and he gave Roy a dismissive wave of his arm. "I don't need anymore rites of passage, thanks! I've had all I'll ever need!" And he thrust forward his automail arm to show this Colonel the proof of what he said, and to make him know that it was true, that he'd left childhood behind and he wasn't going back.

He blinked in surprise when the Colonel caught his mechanical arm around the wrist and didn't let go. Ed was even more surprised when Roy tugged on his arm, and he stumbled closer, blinking owlishly up at the man in front of him.

Roy stared at him mutely for a few moments, jaw set.

What is this?

Why is he looking at me like that?

Has he always been....pretty?

Ed made a confused sound and put his flesh hand against Roy's chest to try and push back.

Roy's breath almost caught.

He touched me.

"So you're an adult now?" Roy said, real low. It caused Ed's brows to furrow as he leaned forward just slightly to hear him better.

God help me.

"Adults do things differently, feel things differently," Roy murmured, "sometimes their passions run in different directions...."

Ed stilled in confusion, flushing. "Colonel...let go..."

Roy stilled as well, his dark eyes seeking and holding golden ones.

Just let me....

Ed swallowed, but he wasn't struggling. Roy had expected him to struggle.

Why aren't you fighting this? Come on Fullmetal, fight this...

Don't let me....

Roy leaned forward. Edward did not move.

You don't want this...me...implications...don't let me....

His mouth was soft. Softer than any boy's had a right to be.

At first Ed made no move, made no sound. Roy moved his lips in a slow slide against the boys, felt his breath, and savored his surprise.

Scream Ed, push me away, fight me.... Don't just let me...

Ed made a sound then, a small sound, in his throat. He had no experience, when would he have had the time? He simply stood in Roy's grip and let the older Alchemist touch him with his lips. And when Roy pulled back he blinked in bewilderment and almost leaned forward to follow Roy's retreating mouth.

Roy almost forgot to breath, almost.

Scream Ed, push me away, fight me...god just let me...

They stared at each other.

Then Roy smirked. "You're being unusually compliant."

And Ed turned crimson. "SONUVABITCH!" And he jerked hard, freeing his automail hand from Roy's grip and staggered back a few steps, panting like he'd run a marathon.

Now the fun begins, the denial, the accusations, and the transmutation of Roy into something unpleasant.

"You think you're all that?!" Ed shrieked, "from one lousy kiss?"

That was so not what Roy expected to hear.

"Pardon...me?" Roy said, "I'm not quite sure I heard you right."

"Yeah," Ed said, nodding, "you heard me. What was that? Is that the 'magic' that Havoc moans over? Hmph, that wasn't anything. Yeah now it's my turn bastard, the great Roy Mustang!" Ed waved his arms, "No woman is safe! Well if that's all you got to offer then you must be doing some kind of ~love alchemy~ on the side!" Ed snorted, nodded once and folded his arms, rocking back on the heels of his feet.

Roy tried to trace back to where this situation had gone surreal. Not only that...he was insulted.

"What do you mean lousy kiss?" Roy asked, arching one thin dark eyebrow, "I didn't hear you complaining."

Because I was all over you, because I wanted to stick my tongue down your throat.... Don't fight me now Ed... the implications will be different... run away now, take your lovely little black leather clad ass out the front door, and do it quick.... Because.... God help me...

Ed colored up a bit, that was at least a little vindication.

"I thought you were an adult now Ed," Roy said coolly, hoping to scare the boy, to send him running. But he should have known better. There's one thing Edward Elric was lousy at, and that was running from dangerous situations.

"This must be why you have so many dates Colonel," Ed lifted his nose in the air, his slightly turned up nose. It was cute. Why was Roy preoccupied with Ed's nose. He'd better listen to Ed's words.

"They all get to the kissing point and realize they've been had!" and Ed grinned. That huge grin, that cocky little bastard grin. That grin that said ha! I'm gonna make you squirm.

Roy's eyes darkened, he felt his fist clench.

Ed's eyes widened, grin becoming uncertain and he began to back away slowly.

There was a brief chase around the kitchen.

It ended with Ed pinned against the table, the edge of which was biting into his lower back. Roy had his wrists and forced them down so Ed's hand were flat on the table surface. Roy leaned into him, forcing Ed to arch backwards.

"Colonel?!" Ed gasped, struggling against the hold, his body yielding against the larger frame pressing it back. Roy released one of his hands long enough to slip it under Ed's butt, which made the boy gasp out loud and give him a little boost up until he was sitting on the table. Then Roy grabbed his hand again.

"A lousy kiss was it?" the Colonel said, soft and rough, "Well, let me redeem myself." A predatory grin spread across his features. Ed visibly swallowed.

"Hey," Ed said faintly, put on a weak grin, "I was just kidding...really you don't have to go to any trou...." He made a muffled sound as Roy's lips cut him off, as Roy's body pressed him back on to the table, as Roy's hands lifted his wrists above his head.

There was something terribly satisfying about kissing Ed. Roy wondered if he could put a finger on it. Was it the way his lips felt, or his hair smelled or his mouth tasted? Was it the way he was arching his body up against Roy's, either by accident or design? Was it the way his right heel beat a faint pattern against the back of Roy's left shin as the older man leaned over him, between his legs, pinning him to the table? Or was it something else? The carriage of this boy? The way his eyes moved, raw and full of his life. His devotion to his brother and his cause? His bravery in all things? He'd swept into Central like a tidal wave and had changed the lives of everyone he touched, Roy Mustang included. Was it all that then? This Edward Elric?

Ed moaned softly as Roy eased up a bit, letting him breath.

The Flame Alchemist hung over the Fullmetal Alchemist, still pinned to his kitchen table.

What am I doing?

Why is he letting me do this?

Sweet god, if he'd only let me....

Ed wet his lips again, twisted a bit without really struggling and seemed to be waiting for what Roy was going to do next.

Roy worked the pads of his thumbs over the insides of Ed's wrists, flesh and otherwise.

Keep your tongue in your mouth boy, I'll come undone.

Who am I kidding, I'm undone already...

After another moment or two of silence, Ed finally summoned the courage to speak.

"Now what?" the boy asked low and breathless.

Now what?

It hung like terror over Roy's head. Now what? Oh he knew what he'd like to do now, but could he, should he, would he?

"Depends," the older alchemist said, clearing his throat, "depends...on you really. Where do you see this going Ed?"

Ed floundered. Of course, Roy thought. That was the safest route, because he has no clue. The only thing he wasn't a prodigy in, and aren't you glad Roy Mustang, that his drive and determination to seek things other than a way to satisfy his hormonal urges has kept him this na´ve?

"Another kiss?" Ed finally ventured, so low and hesitant that Roy wasn't sure he'd heard it right. Was this voice really coming from Edward? The Edward 'What Insult Are You Flinging At Me and I'll Bust Your Head In For It' Elric?

"Oh is that all," Roy said, trying to hide the growing tension in his voice, "is that the limit of your vision. Another kiss, Fullmetal?"

Ed went crimson and started to struggle. "Well you obviously don't have any bright ideas either....let me up!"

"Oh I have plenty of ideas, " Roy said, perhaps a bit harsher than he meant as he gritted his teeth to restrain Ed. Ed bucked against him in an attempt to throw him off and Roy almost groaned.

He has no idea, god help me if he did...

I should give him what he's asking for...

Idiot, he has no clue what he's asking for...

"Let me UP!" Ed was working up a head of steam now, earnestly struggling against the Colonel's grip, face contorted, lips pulled back feral. He tried to get his heel up on the table so he could have leverage with his foot but Roy raised releasing one of his hands, to slap it away. Ed's flesh hand, freed, grabbed Roy's shirtfront. "You sunuvabitch, I said let me UP!" the blond alchemist yowled.

Roy narrowed his eyes and pulled back, yanking Ed into a sitting position in front of him, standing between Ed's legs as the boy looked at him startled.

What you wanted Ed....

And Roy kissed him again, fully expecting to be shoved away. Then when he wasn't, deepening the kiss, broadening it, and he began to let his hands and lips roam. Roy's lips moved from Ed's mouth to the corner of his mouth, to the side of his smooth jaw and down the slope of his neck. Roy's hands rested first on Ed's waist, then up his sides, around to his back and down again. One hand he left resting just above the crest of Ed's ass, the other trailed down the side of his thigh and rested right above his right knee.

Ed's sounds were little grunts and gasps and half swallowed cries. It wasn't until Roy's teeth found the juncture of the boy's shoulder and neck did he get a full fledged throaty sound, a cross between a moan and a shout. Roy kissed the spot after the bite, ran the tip of his nose back the way his lips had traveled and met Ed's uneven golden gaze.

"Lousy kiss, huh?" The Flame Alchemist asked with his customary smirk.

"huh?" Ed said.

The customary smirk turned into a full-fledged grin that tinged on the evil side.

"Now that's what I like to hear," Roy purred around it.

Ed looked, well he looked glazed. His brow furrowed for a moment and his eyes stayed locked on Roy's lips. The look turned endearingly quizzical as if Ed couldn't figure out why Roy's lips were over there and not over here, where he was.

It was rather amusing. Ed looking so flushed and befuddled. Roy caught his chin and tilted his face up to look him in the eyes.

"You ok in there Ed?" he asked, gentle mirth in his voice. That seem to bring him to. He flushed beet red now and stammered.

"Su...sorry" he got out, and he licked his lips again. Roy almost felt his own breath catch, almost.

A compliant, willing Ed. A sight so rare as to be legend. Sitting atop his kitchen table, bangs in his eyes, lips slightly swollen, breathing a little erratic. Roy Mustang knew what he wanted next. But it would be unfair to the boy. He would explain. Ed was a prodigy. He would understand because Roy would not let him go blindly, not into something like this. Roy backed up and Ed made another small sound, almost one of dismay and almost reached for him. But Roy didn't stop until his back came against the kitchen counter, putting distance between them.

"Alright then," Roy cleared his throat, "I'm not one for dancing around issues. I have never gotten as far as I am now (and one day will be farther) by trying to skirt the truth. So here it is. If we go any further with this, it will turn into a intimate situation. That means one of us will end up on our backs", and Roy held out a hand palm up to illustrate, "and the other of us will end up on top" and then Roy brought his other palm down on top of his outstretched one, "this will herald us having sex. Now I have no doubt that I would be on top. I'm older, more experienced and well bigger..."

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL THEY CAN'T HAVE...have..." and Ed broke off abruptly and got a comedic look of uncomfortable horror on his face.

"Somehow I knew you were going to bring that up," Roy said, then shrugged. "I guess what I'm trying to say here is I don't want an unwilling partner. Experience doesn't matter, it's the willingness of the thing." Roy folded his arms. He watched Ed fidget on the table, hiding behind his blond bangs, biting his lip.

I'm so going to hell....

Might be worth it though...

Ed finally summoned the courage to glance up at him, then quickly away.

"How much more humiliating are you going to make this for me?" the teen finally said, voice with a bare quiver, "You're gonna make me ask for it? Is that because you have a guilty conscious?" Ed risked another glance at him then away again.

"Could be," Roy said evenly, "but it could also be that I want to make sure you know what you're asking for. I know you have a lot of books smarts Ed, and I know you have a lot of life experiences to be so young. But, I also know this isn't one of them..." Roy smirked when that comment got a glare of out Ed, "Don't look at me like that. You know I'm putting a lot on the line here, so I think I have a right to cover my ass so to speak."

Ed's jaw worked and Roy almost held his breath, but Ed was never one to disappoint.

"Consider it covered." The boy slid off the table and walked the few scant feet to stand in front of the Colonel, "And I'm here...willingly," he added quietly.

For a long silent moment they both just stood there, facing each other. Then the Colonel reached out, cupped his hand behind Edward's head and drew the boy against his chest and rested his cheek on the top of his head.

"God help us both." He said softly.

It was an odd sensation, lacing fingers with steel, but the Colonel was patient. He led Edward through his apartment, and into a back bedroom. It was well appointed, antiques and other pieces that were not quite right together but somehow managed to work. Roy released Ed's hand, turning to close the door behind them. Ed stood silently and actually clasped his hands together in front of him.

"Nervous?" the Colonel asked, tugging at his collar, walking by Ed to a wooden butler that stood at the end of a large sleigh bed.

"Yeah," Ed said unhesitant, "kind of, shouldn't I be?"

Roy smiled, nodded. "Yes you should, maybe even a little afraid, nothing to be ashamed of Fullmetal."

"Could you....could you not use that name...in here?" Ed said quietly. Roy looked at him in a bit of surprise. "It's just, that's a working name," Ed stuttered, "and this isn't about that, I don't want this to be about that. I don't know what I mean..." he finished miserably.

Roy walked over to Ed, watched the boy's eyes widen as he approached, saw his throat work, his shoulders tense.

"Ed, you don't have to do anything you don't want to," Roy said, reaching out to lay his hands on Ed's shoulders. One warm and the other cool. "We'll only do as much as you feel up to, alright?" Roy Mustang knew how to soothe a skittish filly, but a colt was another matter entirely.

And I should get a medal for all this restraint, yes I should, god he's so...how can a boy be so damn...

He shook his head and sighed, lifting one hand to Ed's wild bangs and pushing them back. Ed tilted his head a bit, leaning into the touch.

A freaking medal because right now I'm a hero...

Roy couldn't resist kissing him, and caught himself before he groaned into the boy's mouth when Ed tried to respond. Ed was clumsy, unsure; he opened his mouth to Roy's but shied a bit from Roy's tongue. Didn't know to offer his own, made all these appealing little sounds and half whimpers and finally Roy had to pull his mouth away, instead he bunched his hands in Ed's shirt and lifted. The boy caught the movement, then slowly lifted his arms and allowed the Colonel to take his black top off of him. Roy's eyes dropped to where automail met skin on Ed's shoulder, his fingers followed. Ed jumped a little at the contact, swore softly to himself under his breath and made the effort to stand still. Roy lightly traced the line of the metal, the roughened skin, darker than the rest of his complexion, over his shoulder and down along one of the braces that lay just over a scar on Ed's chest. Ed said nothing, but didn't meet Roy's eyes.

"I'm told this hurts. To have this surgery I mean," Roy said softly, letting his fingers move around the brace and downward to the edge of the port that was just under his arm. Ed just gave a little shrug.

"You were only 10, 11?" Roy asked again, still soft, letting his fingers move along the port and slowly down the boy's side. Ed wet his lips.

"Yeah," Ed said, non-committal, eyes anywhere by Roy's face.

Roy bent his head slowly; his lips met cool smooth metal and slid slowly to where it joined the warm skin. Ed made a soft gasp and tilted his head away as to give better access.

"In..in a way," Ed stammered, "it was for you..." and his throat worked and he clamped his mouth shut as if he'd said too much.

Roy straightened up, took Ed's chin and turned the boy's face to his, made him look up.

"Me?" Roy asked, letting Ed see confusion in his eyes.

"When you came that day, to Risembool," Ed said, golden eyes suddenly searching dark ones, "at Winry and Pinako's house, and you said to come to you...at Central. Become a State Alchemist. That was what started me thinking. I mean it's for Al too, really it's mostly for him, but I knew that I couldn't do it the way I was. I knew that I had to be able to move like normal...normal people." Ed trailed off, dropped his eyes.

God above, Ed, do you want me on my knees?

"You're not normal Ed," and Roy smiled when Ed jerked his eyes back up to the Colonel's face and frowned, "you're extraordinary. Normal could never pertain to you. I wouldn't want it to. Never be normal Ed." Another kiss, it was so hard to keep his mouth off of Ed's. Ed made a choked sound, and opened his mouth again, offering, hoping.

Roy explored his mouth with tongue, encouraging Ed to do the same. His hands moved again, both of them now trailing light fingers down Ed's sides, then along the waist line of his leather pants to his navel before they dropped to the heavy buckle of the thick leather belt Ed habitually wore. Ed made a throaty intake of breath and Roy released his mouth, tilted his forehead against the boy's.

Ed was trembling, lightly. Never before had the prospect of intimate relations been so enticing, so heady to Roy. His fingers worked the buckle and he knew Ed was watching, his forehead still pressed against Roy's. Roy opened the belt, tugged it, slid it free of the loops and dropped it to the floor.

"This is real," Ed said quietly, "this is the real thing. Sometimes it's hard to tell, I mean for me. Sometimes I get so caught up in it, you know? Everything. You, Al, the stone. It all just moves around in my head like some strange fairy tale and I don't know the end and I get so tired, but I can't stop. I can't ever stop until the story ends. I want it to end, and I'm afraid for it to end. I want things to be real. I want this to be real. Please tell me it's real," Ed finished on a soft plea, "I have to know you think it's real too."

"I won't ever let you think otherwise," Roy said, fingering the button of the leather pants, then flicking it open, "whatever comes after this, it will always be real between us. I promise."

Roy noted that Ed had on boxers under his leather pants. Absurdly charming to him. He fingered the waistband. He straightened up then, Ed looked up at him. Roy reached up and began to unbutton the white dress shirt he wore under his uniform jacket. Ed's eyes trailed his fingers down his chest, watched as he untucked the shirt from the waist of his military issue trousers and shrug it off his shoulders. Ed's cheeks pinked a bit then and he looked to the side and Roy chuckled. This drew the boy's gaze and ire right back to him.

"What's so funny?" Ed asked, brows furrowed,

"It's only my chest, Ed," Roy said, turned and draped the shirt over the wooden butler.

"I know," Ed folded his arms across his own bare chest.

"Well there's more to see you know," Roy said, smile dancing on his mouth.

"I know," Ed said again, the pink deepening to red.

"I never pegged you for the shy type," Roy teased, trying to lighten the mood, put the boy at ease.

Ed snorted in typical Ed fashion. "Well what do you expect? I mean I've never...well you know I've never, you keep rubbing it in and...." Ed risked a glance at Roy's chest, "it's all new and disconcerting and I'm not use to being uninformed and what does it matter anyways?" the teen rushed ahead, babbling, trying to cover embarrassment, "it's not like I'm going to be shy about it forever, you're gonna fix that right? You're gonna make it so I know what I'm talking about at least, you're going to teach me, right?"

"Right," Roy said, smirk in voice and on face, he reached out, took Ed's arm, spun him around and backed him toward the bed, "You lucky thing, you get the benefit of all my teachings on the subject. Why you'll be an expert in no time, considering everyone knows what a prodigy you are, and everyone knows I am a most excellent teacher."

Ed gawked at him, then the back of his knees hit the bed and he sat abruptly. Roy dropped his hands to either side of Ed's thighs, going nose to nose with him. "I promise not to hold back, I promise to teach you to be the best lover anyone could ask for," Roy continued, voice still light and teasing, "on this you have my word. And you always strive to be the best, don't you Ed?"

Ed's mouth worked and it was so funny not to hear any sound coming from this usually very verbose boy, and Roy leaned into him then, forcing him to lay back, bringing his weight down on him, between his legs, pinning him. Letting him feel what it was like to have someone over him, someone on him. To make it real for him. Roy would make this real, because that is what Ed wanted. Flesh on flesh as their chests came together. Ed stared up at him, hands working in the comforter, the soft clink of automail fingers clenching and unclenching. Roy took his mouth again, this time with a little more urgency, a little more demand. Ed's eyes slid closed, his breath caught. Roy indulged, tasting, teasing, running his tongue over Ed's teeth, the roof of his mouth, brushing up against the boy's own tongue. Ed made his delicious noises, gagged a time or two, but he tried, god above, he tried. Ed wanted it. Roy wanted him to have it.

Roy pushed up on his arms, looked down at the flushed vision on his bed. Ed's cheeks, neck, even his chest was rose tinged and once again his bottom lip looked swollen. It was with no small smug satisfaction to hear Ed make a small beseeching noise when Roy pushed off the bed and lifted one hand in Roy's direction. Roy merely smiled, caught hold Ed's right leg and lifted it, gripping the boy's heavy boot by it's heel and working it off, letting it fall with a thunk on the floor. Then a wrinkled sock. Then a second boot and sock joined the first pair. Roy took a moment to marvel at the intricately articulated automail foot peeking from beneath the hem of Ed's leather pants. It was quite a piece of workmanship, capable of the same range of motion as a normal human foot. Its hinged toes looked almost too perfect and the metal instep mimicked Ed's flesh foot like a mirror.

Ed was making a close study of the ceiling and wearing holes in the comforter on Roy's bed. Roy reached up and hooked his fingers under the waist of the leather pants. At the first tug Ed made a small noise.

"Rather leave them on for now?" Roy asked.

"No," Ed said, not moving his eyes from the ceiling.

"Ok then," Roy said, "lift your ass."

Ed slowly raised his flesh foot and dug the heel into the edge of the bed and then obligingly lifted himself. Roy tugged the leather pants down, along with the charming cotton boxers, past the boy's hips. After that it was an easy matter to slide them off his legs. Roy tossed them over the wooden butler, landing on top of his own button down shirt.

"I've never been naked in front of anyone before," Ed said quietly, "I mean you know, other than Al or my mom.... " He finished with a stammer.

"Naked suits you," Roy purred, moving to lean back over him. Ed's eyes flashed to his face then, to see if he was being laughed at, and his blush deepened when he met Roy's eyes.

"This isn't equal," Ed muttered, "you're still mostly dressed."

"Oh but it is, I mean I'm the one that's going to be doing most of the work, teaching you and all. So I think I should get to admire you a little first." Roy said smoothly. He grinned when Ed's rosy blush went truly crimson. "Why are you so embarrassed?" Roy said with mirth, "You're really a nice looking young man Edward."

Ed groaned and covered his face with his hands. Roy gave a soft laugh. He watched Ed a moment, hiding behind his hands, then leaned over and dropped a soft kiss on the boy's chin. Then lower, to his chest. Then lower still to one pale nipple, peaked and waiting. He brushed it once with his lips and Ed made a sound that shot straight through Roy's brain to his groin.

So going to hell...

"You're not afraid to tell me what you like," Roy said, fighting to keep his voice steady, "and that's good. Keep that up, and don't be afraid to tell me what you don't like, this is after all a learning experience."

I'm just helping him out...better me than on the streets with who knows what...right?

"Yeah ok," Ed managed to mumble. Roy reached up with one hand and lifted Ed's automail hand from his face. An amber eye darted a quick nervous look at him then turned upwards to the ceiling. Roy moved up then, moving to the side, lying beside Ed, reaching to push his other hand off his face. Ed visibly swallowed and kept both golden eyes fixed on the ceiling. Roy caught his chin, turned is head and the golden eyes darted to his face, then dropped to his chin and studied it with intensity as if to burn through it.

"Ed you can look at me," Roy said, coaxing the boy's face back up.

"I know," the teen said miserably, "it's just not so easy right now," he confessed.

Roy dropped his hand on Ed's chest, drew idle circles there for a moment. "Embarrassed? I can understand that, I was your age once you know." The Colonel lowered his head, cushioning it on his arm and bringing himself to Ed's eye level. The key here was to reassure Ed, talk to him softly and introduce him slowly. This was the right way, not the way Roy actually wanted. Roy had wanted to bend Ed over the kitchen table and listen to him scream to the rafters, but if the initial introduction was right, maybe he could have that later.

Ed wet his lips and Roy choked back his groan and instead slowly let his fingers draw a line down the boy's torso, drift over his stomach, stop to investigate a small navel. Ed wrinkled his nose, wiggled, half snorted.

"Stoppit, tickles," he said, a smile curling the corner of his mouth as Roy's fingers lazily dipped in and out of the slight indent on his lower stomach. Roy grinned, pleased at the smile, the way Ed seemed to be relaxing.

"So you're ticklish?" The Colonel asked, voice light.

"You better not," Ed warned then, "I hate being tickled!" But he still squirmed under the light touches and made no move to push Roy's hand away. When Roy's fingers did finally move, Ed went still. Roy moved them slowly, below Ed's navel until they brushed up against downy curls, the same shade of gold that crowned the boy's head. Ed took a deep breath, then another.

"Trust me?" Roy leaned close and breathed in Ed's ear.

"Yes," was the nearly inaudible reply.

Roy dragged his fingers through the curls, his knuckles brushing up against the head of Ed's penis, already standing at attention. Ed made a small sound, twisted just a little.

Gods, already hard, the vigor of youth... I haven't even done anything...

Roy pressed his lips to the shell of that small ear, lifted his hand and put his large warm palm over Ed's erection. Ed shuddered, his heels dug into the bed, his automail hand raised and automail fingers curled over Roy's forearm.

"It's ok, isn't it?" Roy whispered in the rose flushed ear.

"Yes," Ed's voice was high and thin and Roy suppressed a chuckle and slowly, so slowly, moved his palm down the length of Ed and back up, once, twice. Ed gasped and sucked in his bottom lip, the automail grip on Roy's forearm tightened but wasn't painful. Roy loosely wrapped his fingers around the boy, pressed his lips to Ed's ear and began to tug and slide. Ed jerked, twisted, his knees bent slowly and he jerked his head to the side, facing Roy and pressed his face into Roy's throat. Roy found it all terribly endearing.

And because Ed was a boy and inexperienced and aroused before he really even touched him, it did not take long. Roy lifted his head, moved up onto his elbow and watched. Ed's eyes were closed tight, but the play of sensation across his face was cinematic mastery. He moved his lips to words only he knew and golden eyebrows climbed and dipped. Roy thought that if it were possible, he'd like to pause time at this very point and leave the boy as a living work of art, here on his bed, flushed and vibrant, for the world to see. But that wasn't to be and Ed's cock pulsed and jerked in his hand and he came with a lovely suddenness, his eyes flying open and lips parting and body arching up hard, held in an arch for a moment, before collapsing back to the bed. Half sobs and ragged pants and a boy's soft whimpers and Roy smoothed his hand over Ed's stomach, as if to rub the semen in and then curled it over his hip and rolled Ed onto his side facing Roy and let the panting teenager huddle against his chest. He ran a soothing hand up and down a lean smooth back and pressed lips to a temple feathered in golden silk. They lay like that for a while, neither speaking, just Ed pressing harder and Roy stroking softer and it was alright, because it was real and that was all it needed to be.

Reluctantly Roy moved first, sitting up, swinging his still booted feet off the bed and standing to stretch. Ed curled when the warmth left him, watching Roy's back, noting with a little irritability that the Colonel still had on his pants.

"Is it my turn?" Ed asked the Colonel's back. Roy looked at him over his shoulder.

"No," Roy said, "you've got a long way to go, it's not something you're going to pick up overnight."

"You're just saying that to keep me coming back," Ed said, then yawned.

"Is that a bad thing?" Roy turned back to the bed, shifted Ed all around worming the comforter and sheets from beneath the languid boy, then covering him in them.

"You're really ruining your bastard image here," Ed said, then yawn again and grimaced, "everyone will look at me funny if I don't yell at you in the office," Ed got out, eyes blinking rapidly as he tried to keep himself awake.

"Oh don't worry about that," the Colonel smirked, sitting on the edge of the bed to pull his boots off, "there's always the obligatory short comments coupled with the fact that as brilliant as you are, you tend to get blindsided easily."

"...sumbitch..." came the barely audible, sleep laden mumble behind him. Roy just grinned.